How Do You Lead Yourself?

by Yen Uy


[photo credits] Photo by Lazaro Revoledo on Pexels

Are you your own personal leader? If you asked me that question a few years ago, I would have wanted to answer an enthusiastic “yes” to that question. But the truth is, I was definitely far from leading my own life. I had always felt that things just happened to me and that chance was always a greater force that controlled and led me.

When I talk about personal leadership, I am referring to one’s ability to steer their own life towards their chosen personal direction. Sound simple? Definitely not. When we live our lives, many of us don’t even prioritize ourselves. Some don’t have a clue about where they want to go. Others are just too busy. But when we don’t participate in deciding on the direction of our lives, eventually, we will feel that disconnection with ourselves. We will feel that tinge in our bodies that says something is not right. When we experience this, it’s something that we cannot ignore. The good news is: today is always a good day to start to lead yourself.

How do you do this? For me, it’s best to think about this in two parts. The first part is about you – being clear about your values, what you want and a vision of yourself. The second part is aligning your behavior based on where you want to go. This part includes how you engage with the challenges and unknowns that you inevitably encounter.

About You

What are your values that serve as guide posts in your life? If you don’t know what your guiding values are, try doing a values exercise. This is best done with a coach who can guide you through the process. It is an important step because your guiding values will enlighten you about why you want what you want. And when that picture becomes clear, it’s easier to form and hold a vision of yourself that deeply resonates with you.

Aligning What You Do

We all would love to think that once we know where we want to go, we will be on our way there. But the truth is, once you’ve connected to what you truly want, you’re vulnerable to life. We all have our fears, our issues with self-worth and self-belief. But if we wish to steer our lives towards our chosen direction, we need to meet with our shadow. Life will always call you to be courageous.

Everything we do is a choice. When we live our lives passively, it’s a choice we make. When we dream and don’t take action, it’s also a choice. The good news is: wherever you find yourself, it’s never too late to take responsibility for your own choices. That’s the first choice you need to make. And when you take full responsibility for where you are and where you’re headed, you allow yourself to become the best version of yourself, fully expressing yourself in what you do. That life is always available to you.

Are you ready to get started?